i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
We have started to decorate penises.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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