Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
