there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I want her autograph on my taint
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize