my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
