Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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