hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize