It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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