Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
