my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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