Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(662): View more from Mississippi

We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.

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(573): View more from Missouri

Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12

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(970): View more from Colorado

I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.

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(631): View more from New York

On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world

(1-631): View more from New York

It's like a tribute to you being a slut

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(419): View more from Ohio

If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick

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(419): View more from Ohio

There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?

(1-419): View more from Ohio

Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.

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(310): View more from California

Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.

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(719): View more from Colorado

If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?

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