I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize