You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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