he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize