An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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