I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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