It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she smelled like a LAN party
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize