I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize
