Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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