don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
