i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
