Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?