Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.