it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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