Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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