I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
