please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm like, not good at living.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
