Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
