Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
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the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
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I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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