you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
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