oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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