yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
