I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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