dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize