Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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