Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
