So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
