i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
