I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
