Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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