I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Randomize
