So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Tornado booty call.. dedication
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
