Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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