You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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