I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize