You're a womanizer and a bitch.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
