Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
