Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
porn star boner night. come get it.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
