I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize