You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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