We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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